Today was not normal. You see. usually I annoy people because I am a morning person. Though I love sleeping in and snuggling up to Michelle, once out of bed I usually hit the floor running. I whistle in the hallways, and drive the caffeine deprived nuts until they get their coffee. Yes normally mornings are my happy place! But not today…
For those who a friends with me on Facebook, this will be story they’ve already heard. I was whining for a bit yesterday, but for those who only read here, this will be new!
Michelle and I got out of bed at the normal time, no issues at all. In fact, we got our showers and were ready to go with no issues at all. We have a small house, and one bathroom, but after 5 years together we have it down to a science.
Being Tuesday, I meet the Manchild for dinner. This means we drive separately. I was gathering a few extra things, so I kissed Michelle goodbye and finished up what I needed. I then set the alarm and went outside to get to work. Somewhere between inside and outside I passed through a wormhole. Life changed from everything is fine to the world hates me in a split second.
When I got outside I noticed my rest tire was low. DAMN! OK no worries, I will just air it up and deal this weekend. But to do that, I need quarters. OK back in the house and headed for the change jar. CRAP!! It was stolen! I had to bust into the Cougar Gold Cheese piggie bank (which requires a can opener (no lie)) to get a dollars worth of quarters.
Luckily, there is a pump at the local grocery store! I head over and its broken!! Someone jammed took many quarters in it! I tried to fix it with the swiss army knife, but no dice! Add to it, the rains start!! Double Crap!
OK, no worries, the gas station across the street has one. Turns out it’s a dollar instead of 50 cents, but I had grabbed the 4 quarters JUST in case! OK we are moving!
Starbucks went off without a hitch, but traffic sucked! I can’t blame that on the bad day though, traffic sucks anytime it rains!
I get to our exit and it hits me… Triple CRAP!! I forgot to pack Michelle’s breakfast!! I always get the lunches and breakfasts together, and I flat forgot her’s…. Damn, par for the course. But I am the king of plan B. I would just go to our favorite work breakfast place, Nollies and get her something there.
In fact, since it was still raining, and I was running late, I would just drive there, park in the loading zone, and be out in 15 minutes! So I take the long way around to allow me to be on the correct side of the road. I turn right onto Harrison and….. Quadruple Crap!! There is a contraction truck blocking the road, trying to park RIGHT where I want to be…
I finally get around them, but there isn’t a parking spot between there and work so I park and head in. I went in to drop my stuff and tell her I will back with food. She smiles sweetly, and says “And maybe my ice tea too?” Quintuple(?) CRAP!! I left the Starbucks in the car!
So I walk to Nollies, and luckily get in just before the construction guys do and place my order (Phew! Something went right!) I got her the normal Potato, basil and cheddar omelet and decided I deserved a ham, cheese and mushroom myself. On the way back I grabbed the tea from my car and was at my desk 5 minutes after my normal start time. I hate being late!
The morning seemed to get better until I went for my morning snack (hard boiled egg) and cracked it. Sextuple Crap!! It splooged all over! Yesterdays was perfect, this one was WAY underdone, and they were made at the same time! DAMN! The morning hates me… I was just going to wallow and starve, but Michelle convinced me to get the grapes and cheese from our cafeteria. They were, bar none, the WORST grapes ever…. I tossed them, but at least the cheese was good! (not worth another CRAP comment, but made me grouchy!)
15 minutes later, I succeed in poking myself in the eye with my own finger! Octuple Crap!! (Nope NO idea how!) Hurt like hell!! It was this time I posted all this on Facebook, and even my loving mother said, “I am kind of glad you are NOT coming to dinner at my house tonight!!” (I know she was kidding, it was one of the first times I laughed all morning!)
After that though, things seemed to get better. I got a text from the Manchild, telling me he got an A on a huge presentation in his English class. Going to the Community College for running start seems to be working for him! He was beyond happy.
Michelle and I had lunch together, and since the rain stopped, we took the lunch walk together. I always like it when we do that. Yes we see each other all day, but after almost 5 years, we still act like newlyweds….
The evening with the Manchild went well! He got a progress report for his American Sign Language class, and has a 98.5% right now. The kid was on cloud 9 showing me that. We discussed multiple theories about the last episode of the Walking Dead over dinner (Bob and the Preacher made for a lively discussion). He then kicked my ass at billiards after dinner, but we laughed and joked the whole time. He even seemed to be enjoying his math homework while we hung out at Starbucks.
Normally after hanging with him, I do stairs, but his homework took longer than planned. Instead, I came home, poured a glass of BFM from Dusted Valley and wrote this.
Yep the morning sucked ass, there is no other way to explain it. But thanks to a loving wife who can always cheer me up, and a youngest son who seems to be thriving in his new element the day ended very well. I am a lucky man to have those two nearby when I need them!