There are many mysteries in the Pacific Northwest. There is the whereabouts of D B Cooper. Whether or not Sasquatch (Bigfoot to the non northwestern folks) is real. And what did the pilot see around Mt Rainier back in the 40s that lead to the first use of the term Flying Saucers?
All these are questions that we ponder on a regular basis. But there is one, more mysterious than all of these put together. One that has stumped me for years, and yet continues to happen: Who the HELL keeps sending me candy corn stuff!?!Now I will freely admit, I LOVE candy corn. I could eat a package in a day, My favorites are the candy corn pumpkins that come out this time of year.
For the record I like the candy that has the white tip, orange middle and yellow top. The brown top (I think its meant to look like burnt corn) is NOT as good.
The mystery I speak of started about the time I came back to the Mighty P. Along came Halloween, and packets of candy corn started appearing in places….
I would open a draw, or a file, or a box, or pull down a book, and there was candy corn! This is not a bad thing, but I had no idea where it came from. Naturally I ate all that I found.
But then, it kept going on. Did you know they make candy corn flavored snack bars and candy corn M&Ms. I know this is shocking, but not everything candy corn taste great!
Surprisingly, not everything i have received over the years has been food. Who knew they made candy corn duct tape!
As I learned when I was a young lad, you can NEVER have enough duct tape! This stays at the office and has saved many a day in the last year. If only there was candy corn scented WD40…. One can only wish.
My prime suspect used to be my boss Claire
As any time I would tell her what I found, she would get this knowing, mischievous look about her, all the while denying all knowledge. Very sadly, Claire passed in this January last (See A Day of Loss ). I was so convinced that she was the culprit, that somewhere around May I was sad all over again. The game was over and her knowing looks were gone (as was the candy corn).
But then, a week ago, I noticed this weird lumpy interoffice envelope in my mailbox. I NEVER get mail anymore in this day of Outlook Mail and Skype. So I grabbed it, went back to the desk, opened it, and found this.
If this aint the UGLIEST piece of clothing I have ever seen…
First thought: Oh crap! Claire’s ghost sent it!!
Wait, I don’t believe in ghosts, was my second thought!!
Then who the hell….. Was the third!
So there it is, a the mystery that defies explanation. Somewhere is a person or people, who knows how many, taking GREAT pleasure in messing with my head and making me crave candy corn (especially the pumpkins!) With me trying to eat healthier and eat less that is bad for me, it is NOT easy!
So, next time you are at the store, if you see someone buying candy corn with a sly look in her or his eye, let me know…